Look out Matt!! ...too late. It was that guy! Behind you! The one in the banana-hammock! I know he is just looking downward innocently gazing at his chubby right pectoral...but he just whipped that football at your face. Good thing you caught it after it caromed off your cheek. Yes, this photo captures just another of the many perils that come with playing with, or near guys in Speedos. It takes an awful lot of chutzpah to walk around in one of those, particularly when you're pushing its maximum weight capacity. Guys with such nerve are dangerous. As such, we are hereby introducing the "Son of Wingstock Abolishment Stopping Speedos" otherwise known as the SOWASS policy. The SOWASS policy will protect you from Speedos while you attend Son of Wingstock. You're welcome.
Oh...thanks for asking, but no. The SOWASS policy does not cover women. Nor does it provide protection from women wearing nothing at all. Nor from emails of women wearing nothing at all. As such, the SOWASS policy is useless when your boss or the tech police come to talk to you about the recent email from the Weregout. We're working on another policy to address that type of attack.
Have a great weekend. Enjoy this cool video (100% completely family friendly):
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